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Suicide is everywhere – How Do We Help?

13 Aug

Suicide is everywhere

In the Media
In our closets, with belts carefully hidden away
In our medicine cabinets, full of long-forgotten pain killer prescriptions
In the bathroom, full of razors
In the freeway, over and under each overpass
 
Suicide is Everywhere
In our Classrooms, kids lost in quiet agony
In our home, where it hurts the most
In our work environment, where we may perpetuate it the most
 
Little by little
Bit by Bit
We poke at it
We prod it
We dump more work on it
We walk around smile-less, pushing it away
 
Suicide is Everywhere
A human terminal illness
Surrounds us everywhere
 
Can we stop it? 
Can we see it? 
 
If we did, would we?
   Take the time to offer an embrace
   A listening ear -
       Un-Interrupted with swipes on your phone to check the time
       Stolen glances to your email
 
Would we take the time
To be Human?

All the Pretty Things

1 Aug

Do all the pretty things in life make up for yesterday’s sadness?

lingering in sweet moments

I wonder

But it’s hard to think with a drink or two in hand

relaxing for once

All the sad moments

from another life

blurred away

Moments stitched together

Harder to remember

like a foggy morning melting into a sunny day

Rays of heat burn

whispers of grey floating away

Bathed in golden sun

I look at the broad smiles of happy girls

and forget

the thought of anything but present

Happiness

Spinning Round and Round

13 Jun

Originally posted on On the Fast Lane with the Flying Monkeys:

Spinning round and round
Giggles swirling around my ears
Giggles coming from me
 
Spinning round and round
Dress up to my waist
Gently undulating up and down
A blur all around me
 
Spinning round and round
Faster and faster
Laughter turn into sobs
Tears down my cheeks
 
I can’t see a thing
My head feels heavy
But I keep
Spinning round and round
 
My legs give out and I stagger to the ground
The blades of grass prick my skin
Grab hold of them
steady me
 
Spinning round and round
A blur all around me
 
I lay down to sleep
Better to stop
Spinning round and round

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La Migra

13 Jun

Originally posted on On the Fast Lane with the Flying Monkeys:

We went out to the Geffen MOCA and dinner with AM and her boys on Thursday evening.  As we settled down with our sushi and rambunctious kiddos, we started talking shop, as AM fondly refers to it.

A year had passed since I changed careers, a career that she so generously recommended me for and positioned me perfectly for.  In a year I had learned that this was the perfect vehicle for my ambition, hard worth ethic, and all around personality of a control freak. :)  I had just received a promotion and she wondered how I came to possess the professionalism, poise, and ability to navigate and distinguish myself while working at a high-powered law firm and coming from Boyle Heights with my highest education being at Roosevelt HS  no less (a school whose distinction includes being featured in the documentary Waiting for Superman as an educational fail factory).

As far as my work ethic…

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Hunger

13 Jun

Originally posted on On the Fast Lane with the Flying Monkeys:

This is hard to share because there’s a certain shame and stigma to going through this in a first world country, but it’s important to know that it happens, here in our country, and that it is more pervasive that we like to admit.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I had you Bella, it was so hard to leave you. You were such a little thing, born a bit early; you weighed 5 lbs. and 8oz. When you would curl up your tiny limbs up to your chest, you could easily fit inside a shoe box. How could I leave you? I only had six weeks with you before it was time for me to go back to work and when I went back that first day I couldn’t help it; the tears kept streaming down my cheeks and it hurt so bad to be away from you. I had taken one of…

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Hate on Sight

13 Jun

Originally posted on On the Fast Lane with the Flying Monkeys:

I run at ass crack dawn every day mostly because that is the only time I can squeeze in one more activity into my busy schedule but also in an attempt to avoid the creeps that stalk about waiting to harass women at night.

As I turned the corner I heard the familiar “hey baby, looking gooood” and noticed two cholos sitting at a bus stop bench that rudely corrected my theory that losers are too lazy to be up that early.

My body went on high alert; my stomach muscles contracted and a flurry of emotions threatened to make me double over as I felt the familiar rage within me: hate on sight.  As I inhaled I could feel my nostrils flare, my chest heave; and all I could think about was how I wanted to scoop up the dregs of festering hate inside my body and spit it…

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Happy 9th Birthday Bella!!

3 Jan

Happy  9th Birthday Bella!!

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